When you host a party, better to invite the poor than your undeserving family

Monday of the Thirty-first week in Ordinary Time  4 November 2013

St. Charles Borromeo, Archbishop of Milan († 1584) -

Rom 11:29-36.

Brothers and sisters: The gifts and the call of God are irrevocable.
Just as you once disobeyed God but have now received mercy because of their disobedience, so they have now disobeyed in order that, by virtue of the mercy shown to you, they too may now receive mercy.
For God delivered all to disobedience, that he might have mercy upon all.
Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How inscrutable are his judgments and how unsearchable his ways!
"For who has known the mind of the Lord or who has been his counselor?"
"Or who has given him anything that he may be repaid?"
For from him and through him and for him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.

Ps 69(68):30-31.33-34.36-37.

I am afflicted and in pain;
let your saving help, O God, protect me.
I will praise the name of God in song,
and I will glorify him with thanksgiving.

“See, you lowly ones, and be glad;
you who seek God, may your hearts revive!
For the LORD hears the poor,
and his own who are in bonds he spurns not.”

For God will save Zion
and rebuild the cities of Judah.
They shall dwell in the land and own it,
and the descendants of his servants shall inherit it,
and those who love his name shall inhabit it.

Luke 14:12-14.

On a sabbath Jesus went to dine at the home of one of the leading Pharisees. He said to the host who invited him, "When you hold a lunch or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or your wealthy neighbours, in case they may invite you back and you have repayment.
Rather, when you hold a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind; blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you. For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous."

Commentary of the day:

I received an email today from a former best friend from my past who has not been in contact for a while. It was a reply to an email I sent him last week. There was no falling out or anything, just the busy-ness of life I presume that makes communication often lack priority.

In my email to him I did lament the fact that my parents, family and friends have largely ignored the fact that I now have a baby.

I received only minimal messages from people and they were mostly brief congratulations on facebook. I have to say it was slightly disappointing, but as any who know me know, I don’t feel sadness or other human emotions since being a police chaplain and witnessing lots of tragic events and deaths. Nothing really makes me feel sad anymore.

Anyway, some of his comments are relevant to what I want to comment on the Gospel of today:

“Congratulations are in order, I think.  Things have changed I expect.
You don't really think your family would forget how you blindsided them, we did warn you. You have to realise that people who respected you and loved you and thought you felt the same, probably feel really hurt and cranky on how you ditched them for a life in a third world country. It has left them wondering, were your ever legitimate or authentic in what your said and did as a priest.    
The reason people don't like josephina is that she alone is responsible for stealing you away from your friends, family and country.
People still cannot believe you chose that third world dump over Australia.  People think you have had some sort of mind meltdown.
Anyway, no use going on about it, nothing you haven’t heard before...”

I turn fifty this year and Josefina was planning a birthday party. I felt uncomfortable about it knowing that none of my family or friends would be coming. She expected that her family would probably just come for the free feed not because they care for me, so she had another recommendation.

We would likely have spent a certain budgeted amount on a party to entertain my family and friends (presuming they would come) but since they won’t be, we will be following Jesus’ advice and be inviting the poor, the lame, the blind... in fact everyone in the surrounding area who are all very poor will be welcome.

I am not saying this to boast, but just explaining how in my parish life I already did this quite regularly. We held parish events that entailed fund raising that gave money to St Vincent de Paul society who regularly fed the homeless poor in the Penrith area. It is a fantastic experience when you feed someone who has no hope of paying you back.
I am saying this to encourage you to try to share your prosperity with those who have less and experience the blessings you receive from doing so. As it has been often quoted and very little imitated, "It is better to give than receive".

Yesterday a poor neighbour happened to be passing while we were having a birthday party for Jane (Michelle’s older sister) who invited only 4 of her classmates to our home. We had plenty of food left over so I invited that neighbour to stay and eat. He was too shy to come into the house and just wanted to take some food home so that he could share it with his five kids and pregnant wife. I put a stainless steel spoon into the bag with his food and he said, “I bring back..”

I told him, “No that's your souvenir for coming..”
In fact, its not even my spoon. I don't even know how many times I came home with a spoon in my pocket from attending parties. I didn't deliberately steal them but just inadvertently put them there as I didn't know where to put them after finishing the meal on the paper plate. I have so many pieces of not matching cutlery that I feel it would be wrong of me to keep so I have given them away.

Jesus knew when He taught His disciples this lesson that they would feel the joy of having poor people attend your parties and realise that they may be materially poor but what they give back in love and appreciation is so much more valuable than another invite back to your ungrateful relos'.

Saint Thérèse of the Child Jesus (1873-1897), Carmelite, Doctor of the Church - Autobiographical manuscript C)

"Blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you"

I have noticed (and this is very natural) that the most saintly Sisters are the most loved. We seek their company; we render them services without their asking... On the other hand, imperfect souls are not sought out. No doubt we remain within the limits of religious politeness in their regard, but we generally avoid them, fearing lest we say something which isn't too amiable... This is the conclusion I draw from this: I must seek out in recreation, on free days, the company of the Sisters who are the least agreeable to me in order to carry out with regard to these wounded souls the office of the good Samaritan.

A word, an amiable smile, often suffice to make a sad soul bloom; but it is not principally to attain this end that I wish to practice charity, for I know I would soon become discouraged: a word I shall say with the best intention will perhaps be interpreted wrongly. Also, not to waste my time, I want to be friendly with everybody (and especially with the least amiable Sisters) to give joy to Jesus and respond to the counsel He gives in the Gospel in almost these words: “When you give a dinner or a supper, do not invite your friends, or your brethren, or your relatives, or your rich neighbours, lest perhaps they also invite you in return, and a recompense be made to you. But when you give a feast, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind; and blessed shall you be, because they have nothing to repay you with, and your Father who sees in secret will reward you” (cf. Lk 14,12-14; Mt 6,4-5) What banquet could a Carmelite offer her Sisters except a spiritual banquet of loving and joyful charity?

As far as I am concerned, I know no other and I want to imitate Saint Paul who “rejoiced with those who rejoice” (Rm 12,15). It is true he wept with the afflicted and tears must sometimes appear in the feast I wish to serve, but I shall always try to change these tears into joy (Jn 16,20), since “the Lord loves a cheerful giver” (2Cor 9,7).